when the well runs dry

it’s hard for us to make it to church sometimes.  mainly because church is at 8am and getting three wiggly little people dressed by that hour is a feat.  but we get there as much as we can and when we do I am shocked (not sure why I’m shocked) that the sermon always seems to portray directly to my life.  I’m sure this is listed under the catergory ‘what the holy spirit does’  that God gave us but all those technical details slip me at times.  

we had a ROUGH week.  going on week three of 5am wake ups.  cranky crankers.  Jack was getting a tooth ( or possibly four).  even crankier.  just tired and worn down.  worn out.  running dry.  today Pastor Dave said (and I love Pastor Dave.  best Pastor I’ve had)  ”let me tell you why I believe in God.  it’s not because I’ve seen miracles that are described in the bible, miracles of instant healing and moving earth.  it’s because I’ve seen miracles in everyday moments.”  he went on to explain that as humans we can only last so long.  we only have so much in us.  as some point we run dry.  we get worn out.  we break down.  but.  then something happens.  that when God steps in.  when we give up, when our well runs dry, when those 5am mornings wear us farther and farther down the slippery slope of hell.  that’s when He steps in and takes over.  when our hearts have taken all the beating it can, and we think it’s just gonna stop beating.  He keeps it going.  WE would give up at that point.  HE doesn’t.  and that’s when miracles happen.  when you don’t give up and you know you have been pushed past every breaking point, that’s your miracle.  that’s your God.  aaaaaannnnndddd……there He is.  looking back at this week I can almost pinpoint the exact times he stepped in.  I can list the times I hit the brick wall.  Times I said, “this is it.  I’m done.”  and sat down.  and then, suddenly, stood back up.  and continued on.  

Moments this week that God gave us (cause we all know I would have sat crying in the corner stuffing my face with chocolate):

riding bikes, stella running “oh dere just so many many sped bumps!”  taking the bumpy, tree-roots-destroyed-the-sidewalk, path home.  

new routine.  bringing lincoln into the nightly reading of “go to sleepy sleep” book.  and discovering that he has been needing those nightly hugs and talks just like stella.  how tight he hugs.  how he eagerly he kisses goodnight.  how bashful he acts when we talk about prayer. 

taking lincoln grocery shopping, having him pick out food for the family.  such great, healthy choices.  (carrot juice, fruits, hummus, cheesesticks -the YELLOW kind he says)  even though I know his favorite foods, it was fun to see what he would choose to eat, given an entire store.  love learning him.  

we’ve had breakthrough in the toddler meal department.  use ice cube trays as plates.  put super healthy yummy options in each hole.  a great little buffet for tiny hands.  they’ve consumed more broccoli and carrots and quinoa puffs this week than ever.  

cuddling with jack at night/early morning.  love those early morning sleep sessions.  love cuddling him and feeling him snuggled in.  

tomorrow is a new week.  there will be moments when I want to give up.  there will be moments of pure insanity.  chaos.  confusion.  exhaustion.  but I know something.  I have a secret, I have a Partner.  my well never runs dry. 

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